One Last Day

Out of money and clean clothes I feel I've reached a new stage of traveller's life. Perhaps it's a good thing the weather has been rather unpleasant this weekend because if it was beautiful I'd be more tempted to go places that require money. I think Israel is doing its best to prepare me for Scotland's weather - grey days are all I've seen since arriving in Herzliya, with the exception of one afternoon stint of sunshine. I'm beginning to have trouble grasping the notion that I leave the day after tomorrow. I've been getting a little desperate to move on and start the next stage of journeying, but now that it's the day after tomorrow my brain is losing the ability to comprehend what this means. It took me weeks to adjust to the idea that I was in Israel; once the homesickness passed I would laugh to myself whenever I thought this because it just sounded so strange in my head. "Hey Ilana, whatcha doing?" "Oh, not much! Just chilling in Israel." You know when you do something that is so out of sorts of your normal life that you can't help but find it a little hilarious? It was like that.

February promises to be an interesting month in three different countries - actually four, because I'll still be in Israel in the morning of February 1st - and spent on various continents. I fly to Scotland this Wednesday afternoon, February 1st, where my Dad will pick me up from the airport and we'll stay at my Grandpa's house. After a week in Scotland my Dad and I are spending a week in Germany. Then it's back to Scotland and my Mom and little sister, Maya, are arriving on the 17th. They're staying about a week but I leave on the 22nd so I only see them a few days. For me it's off to California to see my older sister, Noa and the Pacific Ocean. This will be my first time on the western coast; I've never been farther than New York! I'm really looking forward to having a month with family. It'll be nice not having to be the one in charge all the time or responsible for figuring out how to get places and such. Also it'll be nice to not only be traveling with people, but the people I know best.

The past few days in Herzliya have been a little boring, but it's also been nice just to relax and not have to be doing something all the time. Not to mention the weather hasn't been conducive with major explorations. I've spent a lot of time with Ronit and we get along very well. It's weird that I've never met these people before, but we're family so that overrides the normal behavioral codes of strangers. On Saturday I went into Tel Aviv with Ronit and a friend for a few hours and we saw the movie, "The Artist." Please go see it if you haven't, you will love it. And then, with a few other friends, we went to a bar for a while. There's something really nice about being able to go into a bar, sit at a table with your friends, and just have a beer. None of that "let's get so wasted tonight!" attitude, though of course there are still times that's true. Pretty much the rest of my time here has been spent in an unexciting manner. I stay up late watching movies with Ronit and sleep late in the mornings. Grey weather means occupying my time trying to get organized for leaving which takes surprisingly little effort when you've only been using the very topmost layer of your suitcase. I don't know why I thought I needed such a big suitcase or so much stuff - first time travellers' folly I suppose. So now I have this oversized, unwieldy suitcase to drag around with me. Next time I travel I'm getting a backpack! And travel companion(s) - I will be accepting applications upon my return.

I still don't know if I'm going to be sad to leave or not. As a Jew, there is automatically a connection to Israel that isn't present in other countries I will visit. I've changed and grown up a lot since leaving home and I don't know if that's solely because I was forced to, or if it was partially due to being here, in Israel. My relationship with Judaism has certainly changed. The older I've gotten the more I've resented Judaism and pulled away from it, because all my life it's been something that's distanced me from those around me. I wasn't allowed to go out on Friday nights when I was younger because of Shabbat, and so it separated me from my friends. There were restrictions on what I ate and I had a Bat Mitzvah and there were certain days a year I didn't go to school for Jewish holidays. All these things made it so I never quite fit in, but here those things are exactly what unite me with the people around me and make me a part of this community. I don't feel any more religiously inclined than I did before leaving home and no, I'm not going to go to Synagogue more than I do now or refrain from using electricity on Saturdays and I still don't believe in any God. But Judaism is both a culture and a religion, and I think I can definitely draw partially from both sides in new ways that I have been resisting my whole life. I suppose all that is because I'm in Israel, but I think the ways I've grown up and become more mature and responsible are more important and simply due to traveling alone. When I think about how I could have been in college right now I am so unbelievably glad I took this year off. I'm definitely learning more than I think I could have in college, at least in respects to life and myself and all good things.

This might be my last post from Israel!

Herzliya One More Time

I'm back in Herzliya, at Avi's house. I think I'll spend my last five nights here. Being with family, and being back where I started, seems like a nice way to end my trip. When I last wrote I was just leaving for Tel Aviv to see the last of my parents' contacts, the Beazleys. The trip to Tel Aviv was easy - I'm no longer afraid of the bus system or not knowing where I'm going. I have vague memories from my 11 year old trip of Noa Beazley, their daughter. She's the same age as I am and in a similar boat; she's about to leave for the US where she plans on spending a few months. On Tuesday we walked around for the afternoon, Noa pointing out all the good stores to see and places to eat. I think that must be the reason people can tolerate the cramped conditions and lack of space of cities: the food. I wish I had more time and money and room in my stomach so that I could just go around eating all the food. As a land of immigrants, Israel is blessed with a diverse range of food so that you can find most ethnicities on most streets. I remain partial to the falafel joints; what am I going to do without falafel when I get home? I've decided that if all else fails in my life I'll just open a falafel/bookstore/cafe. It was interesting getting Noa's perspective on Tel Aviv in that she has a very negative opinion of Israel. I haven't met someone who so dislikes living here, but it's true that this isn't a place for everyone. I don't know that it's a place I could imagine living. The people are rather aggressive at times and there are a whole different set of concerns than you face. Nonetheless, she and I had a fair bit in common and I enjoyed hanging out with her.

On Wednesday I went back to Jerusalem and, where else, Danny's apartment. Sometimes I think what my trip might have been like if they didn't have that apartment; I've gone back four or five times and stayed between a night and week. Danny's cousin, James, hosts meditation classes on weeks that he is available so I attended this one. As someone who has never done any meditation beforehand, the idea of sitting quietly for half an hour had me a little wary as to whether I'd enjoy it or not. Surprisingly it wasn't nearly as difficult as I'd expected. Afterwards he spoke on the topic of true strength and confidence, and how that means being able to open yourself up and present some vulnerability. People who are hard faced may come across as strong, but it's usually fear that closes them up. The closing point of his talk was that if we accept this as true, then why don't we do it? Why don't, or why can't, we open ourselves up and let in what the world is offering?

Thursday was my last day in Jerusalem, and it was such a wonderful day. I got breakfast at a cafe my sister highly recommended which turned out to be a good place to read for an hour or so and start the day slowly. I meandered around Ben Yehuda Street and Jaffa Street finding presents for family with my dwindling money supply. I got the best falafel I'd had so far and met some cool Americans in the Max Brenner chocolate store. Afterwards I met up with Danny and ventured into the shuk for the last time. On our way home, a street vendor Danny befriended invited us into his little store to show us how he makes pita. This is something he's been doing since he was six years old and has the skill and deftness of hand to show for it. He took one of the large pita fresh from the fire pit, painted it with olive oil and zatar, and cut it like a pizza for us to take. And the way he and Danny became friends is because the man smiled at Danny one day and so Danny introduced himself the next time he saw him. It's really that simple.

Do you remember the woman I so adored? The one I went to for Shabbat dinner with Danny - before New Years I think. Well, to my slight embarrassment, Danny e-mailed her what I wrote about her. About two weeks ago, when I was in the desert, I received a call from her inviting me over should I find myself in Jerusalem again. So a bit later in the afternoon I paid her a visit and it was extraordinary. I was only there for about half an hour because she had a lot of work to do, but we had such an intense one-on-one conversation while I was there. I've never been so exhausted after a conversation with someone, but it was so intense and connected and engaging for those 30 minutes that it might have been a good thing we couldn't go on indefinitely. Though I wouldn't have minded going on indefinitely. I have such admiration and respect for her; I truly hope to see her again. And to strive to affect people the way talking to her affected me.

Hovav, one of Danny's roommates, played his first guitar show Thursday night. It was really fun and he did an amazing job performing the songs he wrote while traveling. On a selfish side of things, I got to see all the people I'd met at various times spent at Danny's apartment and say goodbye on my last night in Jerusalem. It was strange and sadder leaving this morning than I'd expected. I've always gone back there after and in between various stages of my trip that to say a goodbye (for now) to the apartment, the city, Danny, Moshe, Hovav, and Aaron felt a bit like leaving the desert or leaving home. The trip to Herzliya took a couple of hours but it was simple. Avi picked me up from the bus stop because of the rain and I've spent most of the afternoon chilling with Ronit and watching tv and movies...which is weird because I haven't watched tv in weeks. I have four whole days left (is that it?) before meeting my Dad in Scotland (he leaves today). I'm hoping for some nicer weather so that I can better make use of them and do some exploring. I still don't really know how I'm getting to the airport on Wednesday and I've got a very small amount of money left but I think - I know - it will be all good. Shabbat Shalom everyone.

The Past Few Days

First of all, I'm sorry for all the spelling errors. It's really hard to fix them on an iPad.

The past few days have been about as different as possible as anything I would have experience in Maine. On Tuesday I went traveling with Avi in the north of the country. He knows so much history which makes him a great tour guide. We went to Ceasarea, which I'd actually visited with my dad when we came to Israel seven years ago. It's an old ruined city next to the Mediterranean. If I thought there were a lot of cats wandering Herzliya, it's nothing compared to the population there. You could take a picture facing any direction and
find at least half a dozen cats in it. Cats on trash cans. Cats amon stone ruins. Cats peeking out of hedges. Everywhere. Afterwards. Proceeded farther north to Tivon, the site of the first farm I intended to WWOOF at. We had hoped to visit the place to just check it out, but our call to see if that was okay was received quite rudely and a bit strangely. It was a Little suspicious and I .decided not to go there. It's not worth it since I have other things to do and a bad feeling about it. So after Tivon we continued to the Kinneret, also known as the Sea of Galilee. I saw it from about every possible angle as we progressed farther north into the Golan Heighta. To get there we drove along the border to where you can see both Syria and Jordan, and then there's an extremely steep and winding road directly upwards. Remember what I said about Israelis liking to drive fast? Okay well imagine that, racing uphill, slowing just enough to make a 180 degree corner, then rocketing off again, same corner, over and over. Meanwhile there are "beware of landslides" signs the whole way, just to add a new level of terror. But once you're up there it's incredible. Therer are viewpoints where you can see for miles. All in all we were gone for 10 hours that day traveling. When we returned Ronit invited me to a bar with her and the friend I'd met on Monday, Neva. I was fairly exhausted from Thea say but the advice I was given before coming was to say yea to any offer that you are on the fence about. So I went and it was pretty fun though we didn't stay long.

Wednesday was my first day really fending for myself. I had called Noa's friend, Grumer's, the night before to see if I could come visit him in Tel Aviv and stay in his apartment that night. I found the bus onto Tel Aviv without much difficulty and Grumer's met me at the central bus station. This is the second largest bus station in the world, only beat recently by one in India. There are seven floors with buses and stores and tons of people. Tel Aviv itself is a bit like an Israeli version of New York. Grumer had to work all day so he gave me a map and told me places to check out and I spent the rest of the afternoon exploring from Allenby to Dizengof.

On Thursday I found my way back to Herzliya. If I thought car drivers were bad, they've got nothing on bus drivers. At times there are half a dozen lanes and all the cars are weaving back and forth making use of every lane. Then the bus drivers come in and honk and curse their way amongst the cars, making just as much use of every single lane. THEN the motorcyclists come into play. They're weaving around cars and buses, who are already weaving across lanes, at ridiculous speeds. Someone told me more Israelis have died in car accidents than in all the wars combined and I have no trouble believing it. I finally found a place to change traveler's cheques on Thursday. After going to 3 or 4 change booths and one bank, the post office changed them for me. I have $200 worth of shekels that might last me my whole time here. The rest of the day was spent reading and making calls, trying to find a place to stay tomorrow night. I wdnt out for pizza with Ronit in the evening, and then later I went out with Eyal and one of his friends. We werre going to go to a bar but it was packed sowe went to a hookah bar. Definitely an interesting experience that you won't find in Maine, but it was fun.

We are going into Jerusalem tomorrow so I will just take my suitcase and stay there instead of struggling my suitcase onto a bus. I'm staying with another of Noa's friends and the brother of her boyfriend tomorrow, Danny. Then Sunday night friends of my parents, the Paley's, said I could stay with them. I have about a week and a half in Jerusalem before I plan to go volunteer at a kibbutz with some other friends of my parents for a week or so.

I am struggling to learn hebrew as quickly as possible. Everyone here speaks some degree of English, and while most people don't mind that I can't speak Hebrew, some are very rude about it. I can't really form sentences yet but I know words here and there and I try to work in what I know as much as possible. Ronit is quite helpful and she says my accent has promise.

Israelis are much more outgoing and upfront than Americans. People come up and talk to you often, yeah they are hitting on you about half the time, but sometimes they just want to talk or ask questions or offer you help. I walked into the bus station yesterday on my way back to Herzliya and the guy in front of me turned around and asked me where I was going and then took me up to floors and found my bus for me. He could probably see the look of bewilderment in my eyes, but that's just not something that really happens in the US. So yes, Israelis can be very helpful and sweet, but they are also not very polite always. I feel like I need a thicker skin here. I don't usually think of Americans as being polite, but compared to here they definitely are. Here you have to be more aggressive. "excuse me" rarely works, it has to be accompanied with shoving your way through the crowd. But I'm getting used to it, as well as the weekend being Friday and Saturday and 24-hour clocks.

I think I had some sort of romanticized notions about this trip in my head. The thought of not knowing where I might be the next day was exciting. And it is, but it's also stressful and a bit lonely. It's a good thing all my plane tickets are bought and I'm committed to this trip because I really thought of ways to get out of it the first few days here. On the plane rides I was so mad at myself for doing this, but it's good for me. I am entirely in control of where I go and what I do. I can't sit around and mope when I get sad, I have to always figure out where to get money or food or where I'll be sleeping the next night. I originally thought this would be easier than Thailand because I'd be with family and I have a cell phone so I can talk to my parents as often as I want, but in Thailand I will be in one place the whole time. I won't have to live outed my suitcase a few days at a time and I'll have a job to do. Here I have no requirements or expectations, which is good and bad. But like I said, each day gets a bit easier and I'm really glad I have no choice but to see this through.

Israel!

I'm in Israel! I take back all my airport fears...they are super easy to navigate. After two flights, one ocean, and about 14 hours I safely made it to Tel Aviv where my dad's cousin, Avi, picked me up to drive me to his home in Herzliya. He and his wife are incredibly nice, as are their children. They have a daughter, Ronit, who is 20 and a son, Eyal, who is 27. They have an older son too but he doesn't live at home. They also have a very fluffy dog named Snowy who looks like she'd be a bit better suited for Maine's climate. Between jet lag and homesickness I didn't do much after arriving. I went to bed at 7 and slept until 10 this morning so I'm successfully on Israel time.

Most of today was spent alongside the Mediterranean in gorgeous weather. It's so bright and warm here! In the morning Miri (Avi's wife) took me to the marina on the other side of town. Sooo many boats. We also explored the mall for a little while before heading home. Ronit's friend came over and we all ate lunch together. Then I went out with Ronit and her friend to a different part of the coastline. Here we were on cliffs overlooking the sea. It was so incredibly beautiful. I wish I got to live so close to such lovely places.

Tomorrow Avi has taken the day off work and we are going exploring in either Jereusalem or up north (my choice). I will probably spend the rest of the week here in Herzliya before going to volunteer at my first farm in Tivon, which is just outside of Haifa and I've been told a beautiful place. I got in touch with them today and am expecting a call back later this afternoon to finalize what day I should come. That's all I can write for now because I'm on Avi's iPad and don't want to kill it, but there's sure to be more to come!